Follow the White Rabbit...

I took a detour and found myself amongst the wealthy with the good views. I could see into a window and found myself wondering what it takes to be wealthy enough to live there. I was tempted to door knock and ask. I wondered if it was worth it, if they were happy. Who wouldn't be happy with a view like that I wonder...

I almost got lost in wealthy good views territory but the White Rabbit showed me the way back to reality and I ended up at one of my favourite stores. Lettraset is extinct they told me, so I purchased the new improved version and am looking forward to see if it works as well. I scampered home in the hopes that nobody saw me out and about today. I hope the White Rabbit didn't lead me astray.

I made a tree from a branch today and decorated it with the least religious items I could summon.. although I'm sure my Mum will find something religious about a random star, a bell and a vintage angel and consider my soul saved. I debated with myself about why I needed a tree, and then tried to rationalise it to myself. It still doesn't make sense that an atheist has a decorated 'tree' up for the holiday season (albeit a bit early) but I guess some traditions are hard to conquer. My rationale is simply that I am not a heartless scrooge. Of all the things I enjoy the most about the holiday season its that I get to spend time with friends and family, and I get to shop for them (and sometimes for me too). There is nothing religious or spiritual in that and I don't really see the need to ditch the opportunity to give, recieve, love, be loved, eat, drink and be merry, just because I don't give a stuff if some dude was born on the 25th December several hundreds of years ago. Many a dude and dudette have been born on the 25th of December since then too. I don't really give a stuff about them either. Nor do I give much of a stuff about the Queen, but we have a day off for her birthday too. That and I like getting stuff on a day other than my birthday, and that wouldn't happen if I didn't partake in celebrations.

I like chocolate too and for that reason I will also be participating in Easter / Solstice celebrations for many years to come. There is no harm in celebrating fertility after all.

I watched the rain today from the shelter of the patio. I love nothing as much as that beautiful clean air smell, the luscious green the grass turns when wet, and the sound of rain on the tin roof. I only miss the view we used to have at Mum and Dad's place before they were surrounded by houses. Green paddocks spotted by a few horses in their rain coats and the wild ducks out for a shower. For a while I've been wondering if I want to have a small plot of land in town with all its conveniences, shops, restaraunts, cafes, art galleries, take-aways and supermarkets that are open late every night of the week. Or do I want a bigger plot of land outside of town with a nice view and room for a few ducks or fainting goats. It's not as convenient but when it rains I think I'd prefer it.

I decided today I need to live life in a more meaningful way. If I'm depressed about going to work every day and feeling as if I exist without any real purpose then I need to find meaning and purpose. I'm not sure what it is yet but I'm almost positive it isn't working in an office everyday for the rest of my life, no matter how easy the money. I like to be creative and bring beauty to the world. Apart from a self-sustained artist or designer I don't yet know what that will entail. If anyone has any suggestions, let me know.

For now I will leave you with your thoughts while I go and rustle up some grub.


Jessie MC
Black Is Not A Colour